The rules for Ali’s flash fiction blogfest were to write 250 words or less about something unexpected that occurs on Independence Day. Since I can’t write short stories to save my life, I resorted to my PR background and wrote a very cheesy, “fictional” news article. It even has a picture. For those familiar with The Onion, this is the kind of article you might find there. Enjoy!
Rapid City, South Dakota, July 4, 2011 – Workers at Mount Rushmore National Monument were startled Monday morning to discover a giant cow head carved into the rock beside the four presidents. No one can account for how the gaffe came to be.
“I’ve never seen anything so bovine in my life,” an unnamed night guard said. “Who wants to watch Fourth of July fireworks coming up over the head of a cow?”
Local cattle spokesman, Hugh Heifer, defended the position of the mystery sculptors. “I don’t know who they are,” Heifer said. “But if I did, I would applaud their expression of patriotism. Cattle have played an integral role in the history of this great country and the artists clearly felt this would best show that.”
Much debate has been sparked regarding what to do with the cow head. Some argue for blasting it off, though there is concern of how that might affect the rest of the monument. Others believe the new addition should stay, a tribute to the bullheadedness and hard work of unknown artists.
“In the end, being Independence Day,” Heifer said, “whether you’re a cattle lover or not, there’s no reason not to celebrate until the cows come home!”
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Ha! That's hilarious. :)I love how you ended it. I didn't realize you wrote flash fiction. BTW I linked to your blog on mine today. 😉
Have a great weekend!
Oh my gosh! That is hysterical! Thanks for sharing! I can't write short stories to save my life either… I'm just about ready to go delete mine after reading the creative things others have come up with. This is awesome!
Jessica – Thanks for the link and the shout out over on your blog!
I DON'T write flash fiction – that's why I bent the rules a little to fit what I can write. 🙂
Nisa – Since I'm not great at short writing, I thought I wouldn't take myself too seriously with it. 🙂 Glad it made you laugh.
Ha ha! Hilarious!! I can't write flash fiction at all. You did a great job! 😉
Oh my gosh. You made my day. This coming from a cattle rancher's daughter. I see cows everywhere (not dead people). Mount Rushmore is perfect. I'd vote for this one.
lol – awesome and funny. thanks for the laugh.
Chantele – It's nice to know I'm not the only one who struggles to write something shorter than a whole novel! 🙂
Cathy – LOL! So glad you liked it.
Mary – I'm happy it made someone else besides me chuckle.
ROFL This is great!
Stacy – you are so freakin' funny! I absolutely LOVE this!!! =)
This was hilarious! These bits literally made me laugh out loud –
Utter Catastrophe
I’ve never seen anything so bovine in my life
Local cattle spokesman, Hugh Heifer
Glad you participated in the Blogfest!
Thanks, Gail, Danyelle, and Brianna! It's made my day to know so many people have got a laugh out of it.
It was fun to do something sort of tongue in cheek – quite a departure from what I normally write. 🙂
That gave me a good chuckle, Stacie. I think you're a natural at humor. You should try a collection of these.
Ho-Ly COW!!!!! (hahahahahaha)
That is totally hi-LAR-ious! I loved seeing this different side to you and this was beyond PERFECT!!
*love*!!!
OMGosh, that is so funny. Well, done.
First of Whoo hooo!! I got to be your 100th follower! and second, hilarious flash fiction post! I love it! What a fun way to play it up, and the picture??? priceless!
Elizabeth – I like writing humor, but in short bursts. 🙂 Don't know if I could sustain it for a whole novel!
Ali – ROFL! What? I'm not always this hilarious at critique group? 🙂
Christine – Thanks – glad you liked it!
Debbie – WooHoo, is right! 🙂 Thanks for being my 100th follower.
Glad you liked the cow-addition picture! It took some orchastrating in PhotoShop, but the real picture is one I took the other week.
All your cow references are great! I wondered at first if anyone could pull off something like this, but you did it!
Lacie – Not sure I could pull it off either, especially after reading all the other well-written, more serious entries. But I'm glad it worked. 🙂
That was seriously so funny. You are awesome!
http://www.adventurewrites.blogspot.com
Mel – Thanks. I so enjoyed reading the other entries too. This was such a fun idea for a blogfest.
I like your humor. Made me smile.
The Write Soil
Totally snickering here. That was awesome! Definitely a unique approach to flash fiction. You should do it more often!
ROFL – that's wonderful!
Been to Mt. Rushmore, long drive, kinda ho-hum. I'd go back to see this!
Dawn – Glad to know it made you smile!
Karen – Maybe now I won't shy away from other flash fiction fests. 🙂
Donna – Thanks for stopping by.
Canda – I have to admit the monument was a little smaller than I thought it would be from the observatory point, but I was still glad to see it in person.
This is great. The most creative piece of flash fiction from this blog hop. So what do you write if you don't write stories?
Thanks for visiting my blog.
Building Castles on the Beach
Brent – I write historical romance novels. Anything shorter than that – unless it's PR stuff or poetry – I haven't yet mastered.
I love it! What a fun, different take on flash fiction. And I love the story itself. You have so many funny little jokes woven in. Good job. 🙂
Jenn – I had fun thinking up different cow terms! 🙂
Oh you are good!! Loved the last line!!
Lol! This is awesome 🙂
"Hugh Heifer"… LOL!!!!
This was hilarious! Thanks for posting it. I needed a good laugh!